If you’re new to the concept of strap-on play, there are certainly a lot of questions, and a lot of incorrect impressions. The first assumption most people make is that strap-on play is strictly for lesbians. And while two women can certainly enjoy strap-on sex (and often do), it can also be enjoyed between a somewhat dominant lady and a man who enjoys anal sex. It could even be used between a man and a woman, if the man has problems getting or keeping an erection. In short, strap-on sex is just another type of sex, ready for anybody to enjoy should they be so inclined.
So regardless of your situation or your inclination, where do you start? The first thing is to understand the equipment, and second, the technique. There are two pieces involved – the harness, and the dildo. A harness is just that – a simple belt worn around the waist, with a place to attach a dildo so that it functions like a penis and allows for natural thrusting. Most harnesses have a type of O-ring, which lets you insert your sex toy of choice. Some other innovations are available, such as the Vac-U-Lock system offered by Doc Johnson.
The O-ring mechanism has a ring, through which you place the dildo. Make sure your O-ring is the right size though – if you prefer thicker dildos; make sure the ring will accommodate them. Better yet, get a harness with interchangeable rings so you can switch them out and have the greatest variety available. After all, sometimes you feel like a big one, and sometimes a narrower one is just the thing for the occasion! Of course, the dildo itself needs to have a flared base so it can fit under the O-ring and stay in place.
There are also two types of harnesses, one that goes between your legs, and one that straps around your thigh. It’s all about personal preferences and comfort, so you may need to experiment a bit before you find one that is comfortable to you.
On the technique itself, this too takes a little practice, and the first few times you use a strap-on, wearing it may feel a little strange and you may be self-conscious. Don’t be. It’s just a toy, meant to make you and your partner feel good. Take some time to get used to it. After you buy it and get it home, try it on. Wear it for a while when you’re in your bedroom alone, and get used to how it feels. Look at how you look with it on in the mirror, and take time to get comfortable with it before you invite your partner over for some exciting dildo play.
Take your time and experiment a little, and before you know it, a strap-on sex toy will soon become one of your firm favourites!
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