Taking a break from dating

Sometimes in our quest to find that perfect relationship we find ourselves putting ourselves out there to the point of exhaustion. Finding a great relationship can almost be a full time job depending on what avenue you are taking to find him.

If you are online dating for example, you can spend hours and hours and hours searching endless databases, looking for the spark in his eye, answering hundreds of emails, getting into chat conversations, phone calls, and the inevitable ‘coffee dates.’

It can be pretty overwhelming and depending on your age bracket, physical attributes and a whole host of other ‘criteria’ for lack of a better term, you can find yourself fairly popular to the online trolls out there and it can be challenging to sort out the players from the genuine men who are sincerely looking for that ‘true love.’

So whether you have been single and dating for awhile or whether you are just recovering from a recent split, there are a lot of valid reasons to support just taking a break.

Although, many of us really love being in a relationship and see how much richer our lives can be and how much happier we are, there can be a lot of bonuses from being single as well. When I’m single for example, I find that I spend more time on doing ‘me’ things. I don’t have to check in and see if it’s ok if I stop at the gym on the way home from work. I don’t have to adhere to anyone else’s schedule. If I feel like eating only crackers and cheese for dinner – I eat only crackers and cheese for dinner.

There is a certain amount of freedom when there is no one else to answer to and it can be quite liberating and it can be a time to be completely selfish with what you do and what you don’t’ do. You can spend extra money on things that a partner might disagree or scorn you for. You can splurge on self-care items such as manicures and massages that you might not otherwise take the time or money to do if you have to account for where all your money goes.

You really don’t have to tell anyone how or why you spend your own money – and that in of itself can just be a lot of fun.

So next time you are lamenting being single, take the time to appreciate and be grateful for what being single can mean in a positive way for yourself. Enjoy those moments of not having to do anyone else’s laundry because before you know it, you will be picking up his dirty socks and daydreaming about that time when you were single!!

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Kristina Shafarenko

Health and Wellness and Relationships Psychologist, Freelance writer at shopgiejo.com

Kristina Shafarenko is a relationship and health and wellness psychologist and a part-time freelance lifestyle writer covering health and fitness, sex, sexual wellness, and relationships. When she's not writing, you can find her planning her next getaway, taste-testing every coffee spot in sight, and lounging at home with her cat, Buddy.

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