TALKING TO OLDER KIDS ABOUT PORN

TALKING TO OLDER KIDS ABOUT PORN

What is the best way to talk to older children about it?

As a psychologist, here are some tips and advice on communicating effectively with your kid, especially when gearing towards puberty or adolescence.

As your kid gets older, it’s better to engage them in ‘porn talks’ for their good. Start by picking a causal location for the conversation; this can be in the car, outdoors, or going for a walk. Introduce the idea by addressing how they might encounter changes in their sexual life and the internet. Avoid using judging or warns that might insight punishment if they watch explicit content or porn. Let them know that you are educating, not being biased or harsh on the subject. The conversation should open and let them ask any questions while you ensure you are not giving out excess probing information. Talk about your experiences, the dark or negative sides of porn, why they should avoid it, the benefits of a porn-free life, and the differences between porn and actual sex. Explain the need to have consent, boundaries, why people have sex, the normality of being sexually aroused or attracted to someone, and the importance of safe sex.  

Communicate on the alternative sites they can use tech positively, and stay calm, comfortable, and reassuring throughout the talk.

How old should we start talking to children about the subject?

I recommend parents introduce porn and other sex topics from age 11 to prevent future problems.

Why is it important to talk to children about the subject?

Talking to kids about sex issues at a younger age equips them with vital knowledge about consent, safe sex, sexual health, boundaries, effects of porn consumption in one’s whole life, and other body autonyms, which act as a pillar for a well-mannered generation.

Barbara Santini

Barbara is a freelance writer and a sex and relationships adviser at Dimepiece LA and Peaches and Screams. Barbara is involved in various educational initiatives aimed at making sex advice more accessible to everyone and breaking stigmas around sex across various cultural communities. In her spare time, Barbara enjoys trawling through vintage markets in Brick Lane, exploring new places, painting and reading.

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